sinful foods and other desires.

Okay I know I need to eat fruit and veggies but lets just be honest ice cream is so much yummier. Thick rich creamy blue bell ice cream; not the loaded with spenda crap either. The good stuff. Vanilla loaded with chocolate gooey goodness. That's what I want. Forget the bannana give me the bannana split. The problem with this is I know that ice cream is going to go straigt to my middle and make me sleepy as I can be; however, for some reason I could careless at this point. I have to get all this sorted out so I can get it straight. I have to figure out why this time I cannot stay out of the drive thru and put up the bad for me yucky fats and start eating like I know I should. Not deprevation but a true lifestyle change again. Why why why can't I get this straight this time. I look in the mirror and I am so mad over it. People passify me and say you have to wait for your thryoid hormone to level out but that seems like an excuse to me. Its like me still using my knee injury as a reason. I want to be able to play with my son and run outside with him. Ride backs and chase him. I need to get moving but I cannot seems to find a way. for some reason that imediate ice cream out weighs any long term benefit I am finding. That is so unfair to my son and my self long term.